Forthwith whereupon, please circumspectually personify upon my evidential documentation in re: employment with your fine upstanding organizational enterprise. My evidential responstigations are italicized for your convenience. Whereupon you conjugate upon my prognostications, please supplant my abode with adequate domestication.
1. What is the structural formula for 1-chloro-1cyclobutyl-4, 4-diethylcycloheptane? 1-chloro-1cyclobutyl-4, 4-diethylcyclopheptane is obviously something that could really fuck up your shit if it was abused, and therefore I strongly recommend that drugs are bad. It structurally looks like delta-9-tetrahydrocannabinol, or common maijuana, but it has an additional benzene ring that generally turns you into one fucked up individual.
2. What is the difference between vector and scalar quantities? Vectors require both magnitude and direction for complete definition, whereas scalar quantities can be measured using a definite scale and they require only magnitude for Vectors force displacement momentum acceleration scalars distance speed time mass. To put it in terms relative to the most common law of physics, "The angle of the dangle is directly proportional to the mass of the ass."
3. Is it OK for a vegetarian to eat animal crackers? No, you 'tardo. Those PETA people will fuck up your shit.
4. Would a fly without wings be called a "walk?" I knew you guys would throw in a trick question, and the answer is "no." A fly actually has no legs, but rather has 2 penises (or penii for you scientific folk).
5. After eating, do amphibians have to wait 1 hour before getting out of the water? Only if they eat a high fat meal.
6. Are you breaking the law if you drive past those signs that say "Do Not Pass?" I'm fairly certain that this would only apply in the State of Arkansas.
7. How can a stupid person be a smart-ass? Can you repeat the question?
8. What if the hokey-pokey really is what it's all about? One thing that I realized when I was in prison back in Texas was that as a prison-bitch, I could do the hokey-pokey without recourse.
9. Why is a bra singular and panties pleural? To take that one step further, why do they call them "nuts?" I mean, its not like theres more than one... Oh, yeah, never mind. I like panties. Occasionally I wear them.
I really need a job. Why are you guys waiting so long to hire me?
Captain Sharky
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